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- Your index finger has ever been dipped in poop while checking a diaper.
- You don’t remember how blow-drying your own hair is like.
- You have peed while holding a baby at least once.
- You know how to snooze while breast-feeding.
- You are an expert when it comes to using a nasal aspirator.
- Your neck and shoulder are almost naturally attached from holding a phone with no hands. (Thank God for blue tooth)
- You are accustomed to making a fresh pot of coffee and always managing to drink it cold.
- You know what it feels like to hold pee in for 4 hours straight.
- You know what is like to only shower every other day.
- You love it when you are able to have dinner after the baby has fallen asleep.
- You have ever burst into sudden singing to the tune of “Yo Gabba Gabba” without any kids around.
- You have ever been woken up by a foot on your face.
- You have ever applied eye shadow with a wet eye brush full of saliva.
- You have stopped using your old alarm clock since your new one cries louder and has no snooze button.
- You have ever been terrified of buying grapes, peanuts or raisins.
- You are accustomed to buying clothes without trying them on first.
- You have ever skipped a meal simply because you forgot.
- You have started referring to your husband as “Daddy” or “Papa.”
- You run around with a bag that would make any weight lifter cry for mercy.
- Your life has ever depended on finding a binky.
- To you, road rage is driving with a colicky baby in the back seat.
I went searching online and most places had the same lines over and over, so I decided to make a list out of my own experiences as a Mom. I will keep adding more as they pop into my head. Hope it made you smile!
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